SPAM MY BLOG.
Thursday, October 29, 2009 / 4:15 AM
i have been blogging quite a lot these days.
i guess, blogging does a better job in expressing myself more than my tongue do.
my useless tongue always got tied up for no reasons.
maybe my useless tongue doesn't knows how to represent me well...
i am fully aware that public blog like this doesn't allow me to have total freedom of speech.
but oh well, it's better than never. (:
i behaved like a kid, always.
i cannot wait for the right time to solve certain matters...
i am always like wanting things to be done now, things to be settled well now.
if not, i cant sleep well for nuts.
i can comprehend that there are just somethings on earth that i should learn to wait..
but sigh.. why on earth that it's so hard to do so?
to me, if i am really upset..
i will suffer from insomnia.
i will never want to sleep or be able to sleep when things are seriously bothering me.
so it's hard for me to really be understanding when people claimed to be upset and claimed that you are so damn important to them and yet can fall asleep so soundly in the midst of battling and all the drama mama scenes.
so my natural instinct will tell me that this is not important enough for you not to sleep and to stay awake to have a serious thought on.
but i know... we were all created differently.
so i can't do much or point fingers.
when things are done in harsh manners, it's almost impossible to get the ideal result.
this is know full well, because i often err on this.
oh well, myself to blame ):
i just wanna say that...
my decision is final.
i am too tired to go through anymore heart breaks.
though i cannot judge anything when the other is too tired to think..
but at least to my understanding, this is not worth for me to keep clinging on.
may it be i am understanding things wrongly or not, i am who i am..
i cannot accept certain theories and ways of approaching the problem...
this makes life so miserable for all involving parties.
so whats the point?
---
today i came to full understanding that love must comes with action.
love without action is like a bounced cheque.
you can write any attractive amount of money on the cheque...
but it's only valid when the cheque can be converted into cash.
whats the point of the amount stated when it would eventually bounced?
will the receiver of the cheque be happy at the end of the day?
people, make sure your bank has enough money before you fill up the amount on the cheque.
you should be smart enough that i am not literally talking about money here.
anyhow...
empty words ain't cool.
mean what you say, show it through your deeds.
don't say you love me, when you are not ready to give and sacrifice.
---
my heart hurts even more.
but i know...
this doesn't matter anymore.
or rather, since when it does matter?
hah, who cares.
---
today, i have decided.
i have gained a new friend, once again.(:
hello my new found friend...
allow me to know you once again and on the same hand, know me over again...
i will be there for you, i promise (:
friends for life, maybe? (:
1. tings charis