WHY AM I ALWAYS MAKING THE SAME MISTAKE?
Sunday, August 1, 2010 / 2:45 AM
nope, i seriously don't think so. :)
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i have one thousand and one things to update about...
but it is always that when you have too much to say, you would be stuck with your very own train of thoughts.
i wish that i am such a good writer that i can finish all i wanna say in a few sentences.
but apparently, i am not.
so bear with my looonnngggg blog post.
hahaha :)
it is very scary that time passes this fast.
july is gone and august is here...
soon, 2010 would be over!
frankly speaking, i haven't been doing any significant things this year.
ohmygod :(
i spent the first three months of 2010 being depressed.
the other two months trying to stand up on my feet.
and the previous two months trying to be strong and attempted to build one impossible friendship.
ha ha ha, my life is a joke.
i spent 7 months, bloody 7 months in tears and trying to hard, so hard to find my long lost smile.
today, the very last day of the 7th month of 2010...
i laughed at my foolishness.
i have wasted 7 months of my life!!!!
ask me if i would really want to do this for the rest of my life?
without hesitation, i would answer an one big fat 'N-O' straight to your face.
five more months before bidding goodbye to 2010...
i really wish that i can spend it well...
i don't wanna waste my time on the one that wasted seven months of my life.
i am a loser that always swallowed my pride down to the pit of my stomach, chewed my own words up and tear my face just because i cannot afford to lose this i deemed precious.
now, i will digest what i swallowed and give myself a route to escape.
escape from whats unworthy to a place where i can find joy.
i know i have said this a million times, but i am very sure that what i say will come to pass real fast.
ha ha ha :)
i have already said, i will never allow anyone to destroy me like that again.
and i so very mean it, hah.
i know that there will never be an one size fits all solution...
thats why i am still exploring how am i going to overcome all these....
it takes time; which i am not very patient about it.
sigh, at least, i am improving....
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last monday, i saw eye candy at a mrt platform!
hahahaha, i was damn happy.
and this made me wonder...
who knows that when you enter one ultra jam packed train after work, there is actually one very familiar person that is boarding the very same train as you at the other side of the cabin?
haha you will never know!
who knows that man that sat beside you at the cinema would be your future husband?
or who knows that this bum that irritates you day in day out would be the one that you cant live without one day?
haha, life is unpredictable... seriously.
my future is a huge question mark....
all i can foresee is that i will be very tired as my school is starting.
it would be very physically and mentally demanding to work full time and study part time.
trust me, i am not any far from being exaggerating.
school is starting on 14sept instead of october.
wish me best, friends. :)
alright, i will end here....
i pray with all my heart that i will harden my heart towards that heartless freak and lead my life happily ever after.
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I throw all of your stuff away
Then I clear you out of my head
I tear you out of my heart
And ignore all your messages
I tell everyone we are through
'Cause I'm so much better without you
But it's just another pretty lie
'Cause I break down
Every time you come around
Oh oh!
So how did you get here under my skin?
I swore that I'd never let you back in
Should've known better than trying to let you go
'Cause here we go go go again
Hard as I try I know I can't quit
Something about you is so addictive
We're falling together, you'd think that by now I'd know
'Cause here we go go go again
You never know what you want
And you never say what you mean
But I start to go insane
Every time that you look at me
You only hear half of what I say
And you're always showing up too late
And I know that I should say goodbye
But it's no use
Can't be with or without you!
Oh oh
So how did you get here under my skin?
I swore that I'd never let you back in
Should've known better than trying to let you go
'Cause here we go go go again
Hard as I try I know I can't quit
Something about you is so addictive
We're falling together, you'd think that by now I'd know
'Cause here we go go go again, 'gain
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YOU STILL MEAN ALOT TO ME, ITS JUST THAT YOU'RE NO LONGER WORTH THE FIGHT.
1. tings charis